Source: და რაც დრო გადის..
მწიფე ატმის სურნელი დგას ოთახში,
შენი კანის ფერი…
მოკიაფე სანთელი თრთის სარკმელთან
და შენს მოსვლას ველი…
საკმეველმა მიმოფანტა სევდის ფერი
ახალა თრთრი ღრუბელია
მე ვეხები შენს ნაზ სხეულს
წვენი ჟონავს თვალის შავი გუგებიდან,
იასამნის არომატით გაჟღენთილ თმას
ბალახს მოვფენ, მწვანე მოლზე,
|Viareggio, near Pisa (Italy)April 5, 1903
You must pardon me, dear Sir, for waiting until today to gratefully remember your letter of February 24. I have been unwell all this time, not really sick, but oppressed by an influenza-like debility, which has made me incapable of doing anything. And finally, since it just didn’t want to improve I came to this southern sea, whose beneficence helped me once before. But I am still not well, writing is difficult, and so you must accept these few lines instead of the letter I would have liked to send.
Of course, you must know that every letter of yours will always give me pleasure, and you must be indulgent with the answer, which will perhaps often leave you empty-handed; for ultimately, and precisely in the deepest and most important matters, we are unspeakably alone; and many things must happen, many things must go right, a whole constellation of events must be fulfilled, for one human being to successfully advise or help another.
Today I would like to tell you just two more things:
Irony: Don’t let yourself be controlled by it, especially during uncreative moments. When you are fully creative, try to use it, as one more way to take hold of fife. Used purely, it too is pure, and one needn’t be ashamed of it; but if you feel yourself becoming too familiar with it, if you are afraid of this growing familiarity, then turn to great and serious objects, in front of which it becomes small and helpless. Search into the depths of Things: there, irony never descends and when you arrive at the edge of greatness, find out whether this way of perceiving the world arises from a necessity of your being. For under the influence of serious Things it will either fall away from you (if it is something accidental), or else (if it is really innate and belongs to you) it will grow strong, and become a serious tool and take its place among the instruments which you can form your art with.
And the second thing I want to tell you today is this:
Of all my books, I find only a few indispensable, and two of them are always with me, wherever I am. They are here, by my side: the Bible, and the books of the great Danish poet Jens Peter Jacobsen. Do you know his works? It is easy to find them, since some have been published in Recalm’s Universal Library, in a very good translation. Get the little volume of Six Stories by J. P. Jacobsen and his novel Niels Lyhne, and begin with the first story in the for mer, which is cared “Mogens.” A whole world will envelop you, the happiness, the abundance, .the inconceivable vastness of a world. Live for a while in these books, learn from them what you feel is worth learning, but most of &U love them. This love will be returned to you thousands upon thousands of times, whatever your life may become – it will, I am sure, go through the whole fabric of your being, as one of the most important threads among all the threads of your experiences, disappointments, and joys.
If I were to say who has given me the greatest experience of the essence of creativity, its depths and eternity, there are just two names would mention: Jacobsen, that great, great poet, and Auguste Rodin, the sculptor, who is without peer among all artists who are alive today.
And all success upon your path!
February 17, 1903
Your letter arrived just a few days ago. I want to thank you for the great confidence you have placed in me. That is all I can do. I cannot discuss your verses; for any attempt at criticism would be foreign to me. Nothing touches a work of art so little as words of criticism: they always result in more or less fortunate misunderstandings. Things aren’t all so tangible and sayable as people would usually have us believe; most experiences are unsayable, they happen in a space that no word has ever entered, and more unsay able than all other things are works of art, those mysterious existences, whose life endures beside our own small, transitory life.
With this note as a preface, may I just tell you that your verses have no style of their own, although they do have silent and hidden beginnings of something personal. I feel this most clearly in the last poem, “My Soul.” There, some thing of your own is trying to become word and melody. And in the lovely poem “To Leopardi” a kind of kinship with that great, solitary figure does perhaps appear. Nevertheless, the poems are not yet anything in themselves, not yet any thing independent, even the last one and the one to Leopardi. Your kind letter, which accompanied them managed to make clear to me various faults that I felt in reading your verses, though I am not able to name them specifically.
You ask whether your verses are any good. You ask me. You have asked others before this. You send them to magazines. You compare them with other poems, and you are upset when certain editors reject your work. Now (since you have said you want my advice) I beg you to stop doing that sort of thing. You are looking outside, and that is what you should most avoid right now. No one can advise or help you – no one. There is only one thing you should do. Go into yourself. Find out the reason that commands you to write; see whether it has spread its roots into the very depths of your heart; confess to yourself whether you would have to die if you were forbidden to write. This most of all: ask yourself in the most silent hour of your night: must I write? Dig into yourself for a deep answer. And if this answer rings out in assent, if you meet this solemn question with a strong, simple “I must”, then build your life in accordance with this necessity; your whole life, even into its humblest and most indifferent hour, must become a sign and witness to this impulse. Then come close to Nature. Then, as if no one had ever tried before, try to say what you see and feel and love and lose. Don’t write love poems; avoid those forms that are too facile and ordinary: they are the hardest to work with, and it takes a great, fully ripened power to create something individual where good, even glorious, traditions exist in abundance. So rescue yourself from these general themes and write about what your everyday life offers you; describe your sorrows and desires, the thoughts that pass through your mind and your belief in some kind of beauty Describe all these with heartfelt, silent, humble sincerity and, when you express yourself, use the Things around you, the images from your dreams, and the objects that you remember. If your everyday life seems poor, don’t blame it; blame yourself; admit to yourself that you are not enough of a poet to call forth its riches; because for the creator there is no poverty and no poor, indifferent place. And even if you found yourself in some prison, whose walls let in none of the world’s sound – wouldn’t you still have your childhood, that jewel beyond all price, that treasure house of memories? Turn your attention to it. Try to raise up the sunken feelings of this enormous past; your personality will grow stronger, your solitude will expand and become a place where you can live in the twilight, where the noise of other people passes by, far in the distance. And if out of , this turning within, out of this immersion in your own world, poems come, then you will not think of asking anyone whether they are good or not. Nor will you try to interest magazines in these works: for you will see them as your dear natural possession, a piece of your life, a voice from it. A work of art is good if it has arisen out of necessity. That is the only way one can judge it. So, dear Sir, I can’t give you any advice but this: to go into yourself and see how deep the place is from which your life flows; at its source you will find the answer to, the question of whether you must create. Accept that answer, just as it is given to you, without trying to interpret it. Perhaps you will discover that you are called to be an artist. Then take that destiny upon yourself, and bear it, its burden and its greatness, without ever asking what reward might come from outside. For the creator must be a world for himself and must find everything in himself and in Nature, to whom his whole life is devoted.
But after this descent into yourself and into your solitude, perhaps you will have to renounce becoming a poet (if, as I have said, one feels one could live without writing, then one shouldn’t write at all). Nevertheless, even then, this self searching that I ask of you will not have been for nothing. Your life will still find its own paths from there, and that they may be good, rich, and wide is what I wish for you, more than I can say.
What else can I tell you? It seems to me that everything has its proper emphasis; and finally I want to add just one more bit of advice: to keep growing, silently and earnestly, through your whole development; you couldn’t disturb it any more violently than by looking outside and waiting for outside answers to questions that only your innermost feeling, in your quietest hour, can perhaps answer.
It was a pleasure for me to find in your letter the name of Professor Horacek; I have great reverence for that kind, learned man, and a gratitude that has lasted through the years. Will you please tell him how I feel; it is very good of him to still think of me, and I appreciate it.
The poem that you entrusted me with, I am sending back to you. And I thank you once more for your questions and sincere trust, of which, by answering as honestly as I can, I have tried to make myself a little worthier than I, as a stranger, really am.
Yours very truly,
შემომაწვა სევდა, როგორც ხშირად ხდება ხოლმე და მივაკითხე პოეზიას ჩემს განუყრელ და ერთგულ მეგობარს.. დღეს ვაჟა ხორნაულის ლექსებს გადახედე და კიდევ ერთხელ აღვფრთოვანი თანაც ისე, რომ მინდა თქვენც გაგიზიაროთ ემოციები.. რამდენიმე ლექსს დავპოსტავ, რომელმაც საოცრად ახლოს, ჩემში შეაღწია, რისთვისაც უდიდეს მადლობას ვუხდი ბატონ ვაჟას.
(ცის ფიქრი ...)ცის ფიქრი აგიყოლიებს,ჩრდილს დაასვენებ მთაზედა.იელვებს ძველი ტკივილი,როგორც მზის შუქი ხმალზედა.მონატრებისგან ლამაზიდარდი დაგიწვენს მკლავზედა.ამ ლექსმა განსაკუთრებით აღმაფრთოვანა, გამორჩეულად,.. __ნათელი მონატრებისა__ნათელი მონატრებისასივრცეებს არა შორდება,ხან მაღლა-მაღლა აიწევსოქრომკედიან ბლონდებად,ხან ისე ალივლივდებადა ისე მიახლოვდება, —შიგ გავეხვევი, ჩავთბები,ფიქრი ხარობს და ღონდება.მარგალიტები სევდისა,ხელშენავლები ღმერთისა,გულის სკნელებში გროვდება.
(სინაზე მზის …)
გზა ამაღლების და დრო ამურის,
ფიქრში _ მუსიკა წყროსწყალური.
ლოცვა ალუბლის და კვიპაროსის,
ასკილის ჭრელი ტანისამოსი.
გულიდან გულში ნაკამკამარი
სიტყვა _ წამალი და რა წამალი.
ღრუბლები, როგორც ფურცლები სანთლის,
გაუხუნარი ბროლი და სათი…
ხმები _ ღვთიური გამოცანები
და სევდა დიდი სალოცავების.
მოდის შემოდგომა მძიმე ნაბიჯებით,
მოაქვს სევდა ბლანტი, მძიმე და ნაცრისფერი (გლუვი),. პირდაპირ რომ ვთთქვა, სიკვდილი მოაქვს, გარდაცვლილთა გახსენებებთ არის დატვირთული სამივე თვე,.. ეს, ვინც გვახსოვს, ვინც დაგვავიწყდა უკვე ის კიდევ სხვა..
ჯერ არც მოსულა ნორმალურად და აცივდა უკვე,..
სიყვითლე ნელ-ნელა ეპარებაა ხეებს, ჯერ ბევრი არაფერი.. მოვა დრო სულ გაყვითლდებიან, ღერა-ღერა დაიცლიან ფოთლებს სხეულებიდან და გაშიშვლდებიან,.. საოცარია, ჩვენ ადამიანები ხომ ასე არასოდეს ვიქცევით, საგულდაგულოდ ვიმოსებით (გარეგნულ იერს არ ვგულისხმობ რათქმაუნდა), ვიმალებით და ვინიღბებით, ჩვენთვის თითქოს არასოდეს დგება შემოდგომა, გულახდილბისა და სინამდვილის სეზონი.. ამ დროს ხომ ხე, ზუსტდ ისეთი ჩანს როგორიც რეალურადაა.
წარმომიდგენია რა ქაოსი და გაუგებრობა იქნება, ერთ დღეს ადამიანებისთვისაც რომ დადგეს შემოდგომა.. იმდენად ამოუცნობები ვართ, საკუთარი თავით თვითონვე განვცვიფრდებით ალბათ,..
მოდის შეოდგომა მძიმე ნაბიჯებით,..
“ შემოდგომის დღე, შემოდგომის დღე,
დღე ნაღვლიანი, ღონემიხდილი.”